I’ve been giving a lot of thought lately to the idea that finding my path might really be a lot less about letting the universe guide me where I am supposed to go and more about building the path that I see my life following. I grew up in a very traditional European, Catholic family and people laugh when I say it, but in my parents house as a female I was either leaving that house in a white dress or a coffin. Moving out on your own was something that was unheard of, I’m proud of the girls in my family who have since broken that mould and ventured out to start to create their own rules. Part of the dynamic of growing up in that kind of an environment is that you always do what you feel is best for the collective good. Rarely do you think about doing what is best for you, especially if what whatyou feel is best will affect the peace within the family.
Here’s something new for consideration, I’m grateful that my marriage fell apart. I loved my husband with everything that I had, but I’m not sure that he and I were ever really right for one another. Our union gave me three beautiful sons, who are the loves of my life, and I will be eternally grateful that our paths crossed. But with the dissolution of my marriage came an opportunity to forge a new path that is right for me. I’m old enough now, confident enough now that the decisions that I make get to be those that are in my best interest and I really don’t care about what the rest of the world thinks of those decisions. It’s the first time in my life that I feel free to take responsibility for my own decisions and to do what feels right for me, and having taken 41 years to get here, I can tell you that the feeling is really quite awsome.
I continue on my path, the whole time feeling the wonderment at finally feeling like any decisions that feel right will be right regardless of what they are. Lessons will be learned, some will come easily and some will come harder. The people who love me will always have my back, and I in turn will always have theirs. In my life today I’m stronger because I have been week, I am fearless because I have been afraid and I am wise because I have been foolish. I am an exponentially stronger woman today than I was two years ago; sometimes you have to travel a very long way to find what was always right there beside you.
Find your path, build a path that will guide your life into what you want for your life to be. Let no one ever deter you from being where the universe meant for you to be, love shamelessly and with reckless abandon. Yes I mean you; I know you know who you are!